
Probably the hardest one of
***
When we were talking about moving to Sussex, whatever my expressed reservations may have been, one thing I never mentioned to Holmes, although no doubt he was aware of it, was my feeling that by moving away from London I would be leaving my beloved Mary behind. In my mind she was tied to the city, to all the places we had visited together, and the memories these places recalled for me.
I was mistaken. Now, every time I look at the impatiens planted by the front door, I am reminded of her. There are countless little touches around the cottage where I can imagine Mary has been. Seth gently showed me where his own wife is buried and said she would be very happy to share her grave with my memories, so every year I lay flowers there on the date of Mary’s death. And in this way, all that I once believed impossible has been achieved.
Holmes has always understood this need of mine and has never resented it. I know, too, that he has his own private griefs, some from his youth, others from the time after Reichenbach. There are days when he spends longer out with his hives than I would expect when he seeks some solitude. For I have my flowers and he has his bees.
(Part of Watson's Diary)
